Most every day is faced with disappointments. One manages to calmly transfer them, others hardly recover after each unpleasant surprise. Perhaps it’s time to accept failures as part of life?

Some of us accept failures too close to heart. “Well, here again! I’m not good for anything!” – they think. Others feel like victims, every disappointment for them is the fruit of the “conspiracy”, the attacks of the ominous forces that they are not able to confront.

Often, having failed, we begin to believe that the idea was a failure and it was stupid to count on success. We are angry with ourselves for daring to hope. The one who seeks to control life, perceives every disappointment as a personal defeat, because he could not prevent what happened.

We strive for predictability, try to prevent unpleasant surprises, but this idea is doomed to failure, because:

    • No one is able to predict future troubles in advance.
    • We cannot know everything. Demanding from ourselves the impossible, we get only constant anxiety and a sense of insecurity, we begin to plunge deeper into pessimism and despair.
    • What seems to be a failure now in the future can be perceived as a useful lesson.
    • If we are on guard all the time, we cannot really rejoice. It seems to us that for a second it is impossible to weaken vigilance, and as a result, life passes by.

    Of course, we can take reasonable precautions, but at some point our intention to protect ourselves from everything becomes counterproductive. It is no longer related to real problems, but only serves as a disguise, behind which irrational fears are hidden.

    Disappointment is not a reason for self -enforcement. No one should consider yourself a victim of fate, to think that we were failed by the inability to foresee the future. In the imperfect world, unpleasant surprises are constantly happening, and our task is to learn from the incident lessons to the future. We can even use disappointment as an occasion to remind ourselves: despite everything, we are worthy of love and respect.

    Do not wait until life becomes predictable before starting to live. When we trust ourselves, we know that we can cope with problems as they become. Of course, we would prefer to foresee the future and prevent troubles. But you can’t reproach yourself for not always managing to predict events with one hundred percent accuracy.

    We cannot control the future, but we can only live here and now. We can trust our experience and instincts and make a decision based on the information that we have. If in the future it turns out that we were mistaken, we will be able to make another decision. We can focus on a real (and not potential) situation and live in the present. We can trust ourselves and decide what issues you need to solve immediately, which can wait and which do not require a solution. Finally, trusting ourselves, we will be able to understand when it is time to finish making plans and start acting.

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